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It's time to reframe our meeting mindsets

When our default meeting frame is that ideas and recommendations are confrontations, we stall before we start. We may reach our outcomes from this starting point, but getting there is significantly more painful and time-consuming. You may experience one or more of the following things before a meeting: 1. Certain

Bursting at the Seams: Managing a 50-pound workload in a 20-pound bag

Sometimes we feel like we are stuffing 50 pounds of work into a 20-pound bag. Because leaders invent, delegate, and assign tasks, we will discuss a few things to consider when receiving or assigning work. Assigning work 1. Check your tendency to give more to the most reliable. A habit

How to stop arguing and embrace other perspectives

I have gone to the same San Antonio barber for 20 years. Noris knows my hair better than I do. I say, there’s a lot more salt than pepper than there used to be. She always replies, “Still hair.” During a recent visit, I asked her if she talks

Becoming easier to work with

A Brief Introduction to Executive Coaching

Six ways we demonstrate courageous leadership

There are many ways we demonstrate courageous leadership and six standout categories that pave the way. 1. Raise your standards by setting goals that stretch your imagination and abilities and create an environment of possibility. 2. Do the right thing by standing up to behavior that violates your values and

Successfully Leading Momentous Change

(Originally published in Issue #34 JETNETiQ Pulse) https://bit.ly/JETNETiQPulse34 Whatever we defined as change before last year, we can all agree that the current definition has significantly expanded. As we finish 2021, the horizon remains foggy, whether in customer demand, supply chain and company capabilities, or employee well-being

Returning to the path of improvement

Many leaders try on new behaviors as part of their self-improvement. These behaviors form a vulnerable veneer that easily strips away during times of stress. If the leader is resilient, they may treat the moment as a bump on the road. If less so, they may abandon the new behavior.

Letting go of control

In times of great uncertainty, we search for certainty. That search often ends with our need to control anything we can. And control shows up as more command than consult decisions, more stringent approval policies, telling more than listening, turning memos into meetings, and directing rather than collaborating. Control crowds

What the pandemic is teaching us about our collective power

Less than a month ago, we were all facing the typical workday challenges and finding ways to manage through upsets, irritations, deadlines, and quirks in our bosses and peers. We told stories about the villains that made our days harder, we spent too much time being victims and even more

6 Ways We Lead Through Adversity

Many of us are justifiably concerned with how to lead our teams through adversity in these extraordinary times. If you are a leader charged with keeping things going, consider these tactics: Focus on stakeholders. When adversity occurs, fears run high with employees, clients, and shareholders. We tend to focus on

12 Leadership Lessons from Low Tides and Crisis

Note: When I first published this a few years ago, it was a cautionary tale about preparing our organizations for ordinary challenges. I hope the lessons are helpful to you now. High tides indeed lift all boats. What about low tides? As leaders, we enjoy the time of rising tides

4 Ways to Make Culture Change Personal

At any moment in time, thousands of leaders are discussing how to change and improve their organizational cultures. How can we engage and make the change personal for us? 1.  Respect the culture and leaders that came before. We change cultures to remain competitive, be more innovative, focus on delivering

5 Principles for Communicating Your Way to Team Excellence

My thesis is that over 90% of business issues have poor communication as a root cause. It follows that even small improvements in communication effectiveness drive outsized team results. Sometimes we choose to say nothing out of fear, shame, or concern about hurt feelings. We may feel unsafe in speaking

Conquering the Fear of Rapid Decision Making

Leaders are required to make decisions and deliver results. When we face a problem, we make decisions, we act, and we succeed, fail, and sometimes learn. As we reflect on a decision, we often find that the determination and subsequent actions were available to us early in the process but

A Quick Guide to Why Coaching Does Not Work

I’ve coached leaders from both sides now, from give and take, and still somehow, I really don’t know clouds at all…wait, lost my way for a moment. I’ve worked with leaders as an internal and external coach for over 20 years. I’m here to tell

You want to go where everybody knows your name

Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name. It’s not just a lyric from the television show, “Cheers,” it’s a sound starting place for creating trust as you build a high-performing team. Dale Carnegie once said, “A person’s name is to him or her the

Control is never perfect and it is never free

Our need to control things reflects our need for certainty. It has notable downsides like added workload, reduced capacity, less trusting relationships, and solving problems when others only wish to be heard. When we control, we adopt other peoples’ monkeys. We decide that rather than risk disappointing anyone, we will

How to use core values as a tool for better decisions

The path from defining a problem to implementing a solution is rarely linear. Despite applying the knowledge and skills of our best people, there are moments of uncertainty that precede critical decisions. We create doubt with a list of intended and unintended consequences, including the decision’s impact on others,

Navigating the potholes of effective communication

The saying that we judge others by their behaviors and ourselves by our intentions is a coachable point I’ve made countless times. By itself, it distinguishes between observable behaviors and initial insight into how we and others define what things mean. However, it doesn’t go beyond awareness to

Eleven ways we make sure executive coaching delivers value

Executive coaches work with their coachees to move them from where they are now to where they want to be in the future. Coaching focuses on the behaviors necessary to forward action. While there is some time spent looking backward for understanding, the majority of the time and effort is

Becoming the five people we hang around with most

We become the average of the five people we hang around with most. These words always cause me to pause and reflect, often only after I’ve spent too much time feeling stuck or not increasing my effectiveness over a period. The following exercise is not meant to limit your

How effective people edit their way to results

“To attain knowledge, add things every day. To attain wisdom, subtract things every day.” Lao-tzu The constant challenge for the busy and productive leader is not figuring out what to start; it’s determining what to stop. The best writers fill the page without stopping to think (or over-think) what

Unlocking some secrets about executive coaching

Nearly everything we do has numerous paths to deliver a result. Executive coaching is no exception. While there aren’t hard and fast rules to define a successful coach-client relationship, there are some worthwhile things to consider before working with a coach. 1.    Establish a connection. Ideally, meet in person

Real-time lessons for accelerating learning and growth

Hanging around with people who care about and challenge us is a surefire path to success and happiness. In the past two weeks, I’ve been fortunate to spend time with colleagues who are pushing the excellence envelope in consulting and coaching, and a client whose executives are leading an

Powerful exercises to propel your leadership effectiveness

As you consider ways to increase leadership effectiveness, two exercises help uncover and highlight your leadership style and values to share with your team. These exercises are especially useful for leaders assuming new responsibilities or adding team members and serve to take leadership effectiveness to the next level. Exercise 1:

Crush the fear of rapid decision making

Leaders are required to make decisions and deliver results. When we face a problem, we make decisions, we act, and we succeed, fail, and sometimes learn. As we reflect on a decision, we often find that the decision and subsequent actions were available to us early in the process but

Recognizing your go-to people

Photo credit: Simon Migaj for stocksnap.io   We may not spend much time thinking about it, but every leader has go-to people on their team whom they count on to get things done. What does a go-to person look like? * You know they will move mountains to solve a problem.

Stop thinking, start moving, and zap the mental gridlock

My caption for this picture: Mind over mattress this week. Start something. Start anything. Move. Starting and moving are not remedies for laziness. They are remedies for being stuck. Too often, we wrestle with problems in our head in a few ways. First, we do not work on the real

A case for the non-obvious hire

Early in my career, I was searching for a hands-on IT pro to support a migration from a single desktop to a fully-networked, SAP-enabled location. The HR director led the search, and we interviewed several candidates. We had a difference of opinion on the final two. He wanted the candidate

Creating value with less noise

Lately, I’ve noticed more cars with after-market upgrades that make them significantly noisier, but little else. A similar thing happens at work when extroverts drown out introverts in meetings. In Texas, all hat and no cattle describes things and people that generate significant noise without creating much value in

Tame the tough discussion

A CEO once asked me, “Is there anything you are afraid of?” My quick reply, “Not at work.” As I recall, he just shook his head. Upon reflection, my response was an unintended exaggeration. The reality is that I’ve had my share of fears at work, but having difficult

Create organizations where people stay

Copyright: photonphoto / 123RF Stock Photo   According to the Gallup Daily U.S. Employee Engagement tracker (Gallup), U.S. employees engaged in their work was about 28% in January 2014 and 32% in August 2017. The inverse, employees less engaged, stood at 72% and 68%, respectively. There are dozens of studies

The power of getting in the way

I am a tireless proponent of getting in the way. As kids, getting in the way led to admonishment from parents or older siblings. As adults, getting in the way creates our universe of opportunities. In our careers, getting in the way shows up in many places. 1. Bringing up

Build a stronger team after your mistakes

Situation A CEO focuses his growth strategy on acquisitions. Over time, some deals bear fruit while others fall short of expectations. For a while, he only shares his regret over the low-performing acquisitions with his closest aides. In time, caution subsides and, he begins to share his beliefs with more

There's power in team certainty

While most of us enjoy the challenge of learning and growth, our need for certainty and stability informs our daily routines. The reason we sit at the same desk in school or the same chair for a weekly meeting is that it allows us to compartmentalize and shift our attention

High performance demands safety first

A CEO tells his team that he is not sure why everyone keeps mentioning the issue of poor company-wide communication, but nothing changes. Further, he notes as he kicks off the meeting, he is tired of talking about it. Lacking certainty, people (including leaders) don’t speak up, and in

Focus on helping your team perform

Late one evening, two leaders and the CFO met in the CFO’s office. The CFO was upset about a perceived lack of effort from his team in completing several initiatives he deemed important. His monologue devolved into personal attacks on each team member as he went down the hall

Blasting through the fear of personal development

In a recent presentation about enhancing communication and leadership effectiveness in our organizations, I spoke about the role of fear and how it prevents us from doing our best work. It inspired me to explore doing our best work on ourselves. While leading an organization change, I came across a

Developing courageous leadership habits

Volatility and complexity impact every organization. Leaders can prepare for the increasingly dynamic work environment by developing courageous leadership habits in themselves and their teams. First, let’s dismiss the notion that courageous leadership is fearless. Fears are a signal for us to act and move through the limiting beliefs

Vastly improving your leadership team and culture

Many times, when I engage with an owner or CEO of an organization that is contemplating making changes in their culture, one of the things that they ask me is, do we need to have an offsite? Do we need to conduct a culture audit? And do a variety of

15 ways courageous leadership shows up

I believe courageous leadership happens when we raise our standards, do the right thing, use respectful straight talk, display vulnerability, take committed stands, and become role models for excellence. When is courageous leadership needed in our organizations? Every day. 1. When we set goals that stretch our imaginations and abilities

Creating a compelling future

Some truths about leading transformation

The first story. Late one evening, about six months into a company transformation effort, I approached a team member’s empty desk to drop off a document. In the middle of his precisely ordered desktop was a message clip holding a 3×5 index card. I picked up the card

Overcome limitations stifling our development

“Is life not a hundred times too short for us to stifle ourselves?” Friedrich Nietzsche When a leader avoids responsibility for his actions, it often shows up as belittling, disingenuous, unsympathetic, incredible, unreliable, and egocentric. This list illustrates the polar opposite of role model leadership attributes. It also reminds us

Knowing where to tap

Once upon a time, a ship’s captain found himself stuck in port due to a broken boiler. He asked around the shipyard for someone who could fix the problem. He was given a name and summoned the repairman who showed up in the form of a 10-year old boy

Leadership whispering during transformation

While working on a company-wide transformation effort with an outstanding cross-functional team, there were frequent opportunities to engage with leaders and employees about what we were doing, why we were doing it, and how we planned to accomplish our vision. Before meeting with executive leaders to enroll their support as

Demonstrating straight talk leadership

One of my most valued and valuable principles is the belief that straight-talk leadership paves the way to excellence. This video explains in more detail: Straight Talk Leadership

Skip Intro: Efficiency is not Effectiveness

I noticed the Skip Intro button for the first time this week while watching Netflix’s Stranger Things 2. After the first scene of the show, the opening credits roll, and the button appears. I pressed it and continued the episode. I thought about how often leaders choose to press

A battle plan against exhaustion

Some owners and leaders are waking up exhausted today. They spend a few extra minutes in the shower, stare into the mirror with tired eyes, and drink an extra cup of coffee. Once outside, they stare at the wall with both hands on the wheel before starting the car. They

Five things that make HR work difficult

I’ve spent time as a senior HR leader and more time as an internal client. Unlike other company functions (i.e., accounting), there is significant variation in how HR work is designed (often haphazardly) and deployed across organizations. There is an ongoing question of how HR earns a seat

What are you getting up in the morning to be?

What are you getting up in the morning to be? Do you wake up to make a difference or focus on three more days until Saturday? Will you take an extra moment to thank someone for their contribution or assume that their manager already did? Will you say hello in

How can leaders handle internal disputes?

Leaders are sometimes called upon to intervene in a dispute between direct reports or peers. This situation can be handled adeptly with some thought, practice, and courage. We can easily mishandle things in the absence of each. A Case Study A CEO wrestles with a sales shortfall in the second

How we demonstrate courageous leadership

I recently wrote about some fears that leaders face. As part of my practice, I work with people to define mission-critical activities and develop courageous leadership habits. This post focuses on demonstrating courageous leadership. First, let’s get past the notion that courageous leadership is fearless. Fears are a useful

How to lead during adversity

Over time, I’ve fielded questions from leaders in companies that have experienced client data exposure from hacks or internal fraud that harmed or destroyed the company’s reputation. The leaders are concerned with how to lead during adversity and whether they are putting their reputations on the line by

How do successful people answer this question?

“I needed to make something of myself.” “You about done?” Jake Perry and Melanie Smooter in the film Sweet Home Alabama We need to make something of ourselves. Continuous and never-ending improvement is a noble trait. But on the way to making ourselves into what’s next, we often lose

How to overcome the fear of rapid decision-making

As leaders, we are paid to make decisions and deliver results. When we face a problem, we make decisions, we act, and we succeed or learn. As we look back on a decision, we often find that the decision made and actions taken were available to us early in the

Taking stock of our leadership behaviors

During a recent discussion, I noted that curiosity and straight talk significantly influenced and defined my leadership development. Both behaviors caused my path to curve in compelling ways and determined my opportunities and effectiveness across a broad spectrum of companies and industries. These are my top two, but you can

Let's create companies where people want to stay

According to the Gallup Daily U.S. Employee Engagement tracker (Gallup), U.S. employees engaged in their work stood at about 28% in January 2014 and 32% in August 2017. The inverse, employees less engaged, stood at 72% and 68%, respectively. There are dozens of studies and surveys that demonstrate

Leadership Lessons from Low Tides

It’s true that high tides lift all boats. What about low tides? As leaders, we enjoy the time of rising tides and business fortunes, but experience increased complacency and expectations for the high tides to continue. The low tides provide leaders the opportunity to test their resilience, creativity, and

Building a Personal Leadership Framework

I frame my leadership through a lens of leaving the people and places I work better than I found them. This may seem trite, but its simplicity helps me frame my decisions, actions, and contributions. I break down my approach into two categories — people and processes. Your version will be

There's Power in Being in the Way

I’m not a believer in luck or magical thinking outside of Harry Potter novels. I am, however, a tireless advocate of being in the way. As children, being in the way led to admonishment from our parents or older siblings. As adults, being in the way creates our universe

This is why words (still) mean something

Photo credit: Leeroy for StockSnap.io There is a reasonable chance that this post will offend some readers. It touches upon free speech, accountability, and the premise that words mean something. I thought it would be enough to write it and file it away. It wasn’t. I believe we

This is what we're afraid of as leaders

Once we dispense with the notion of the fearless leader, an urban myth to lead them all, we can make our way to a list of things that go bump in the day and night. I find it helpful to name the fears, much like repeatedly saying the name Voldemort

Being more effective when the boss' behavior changes

I recently coached a manager whose relationship with her VP had changed during the past few months. Up to that point, the multi-year partnership had worked well, but the VP was now making comments in staff meetings that left the manager feeling undermined and betrayed. She was confused and thought

Creating Earnout Agreements that Work

The use of earnout agreements to acquire companies continues to be a favorite way for buyers to limit up-front cash, share the risk in the acquired company’s future financial performance, and engage the seller in continuing as an employee to help reach deal objectives. As with any deal, the

An Exercise: Requirements vs. Preferences

Sometimes we get fed up with the things happening around us at work and want to run away. We then go home, look at the family, think about eating and paying the mortgage, and get up and go back to work the next day. Often, we feel guilt or shame

Today's Run is Private

During my pre-dawn run this morning Venus was bright, my headlamp lit the way, and traffic was quiet. I don’t run with music anymore, so the only sounds were from a few birds rustling in the trees and my breathing and footsteps. A bat flew silently over my head

Relationships with Nepotism

“Oh yeah, I was this close to getting a chair in the Polish Philharmonic, and I nailed the audish, but I didn’t get it. You know who did? Yo-Yo Ma’s cousin, little nepotiz” Jack Black character Dewey Finn from School of Rock For some reason, nepotism has been

Two Exercises to Increase Leadership Effectiveness

As you consider ways to increase leadership effectiveness, two exercises can help uncover and highlight your leadership style and values to share with your team. These practices are especially useful for leaders assuming new responsibilities or adding team members and serve to take personal leadership effectiveness to the next level.

Improving Organizational Memory

A diner arrives for breakfast in a five-star hotel restaurant. She has numerous severe food allergies and no meals off for good behavior. Every day takes vigilance and patience to stay healthy. For this celiac, a bite of wheat gluten begins a four-day cycle of body distress, pain, and brain

Super-Criteria for Leadership Recruiting

Photo credit: Chris Barbalis/StockSnap.io The leadership recruiting process unleashes many emotions in a hiring manager. When we start the process, we are hopeful of finding great people. As it continues, we experience frustration as we screen more resumes than we expected. When we connect with a candidate on

The Four-Word Question

The quality of questions we ask determines the effectiveness of our leadership and lives. As leaders, we are paid to deliver results for our people, companies, customers, owners, and communities. Along the way, we ask any number of questions, often ones that don’t serve us because we frame them

Uber, Words, and Snowflakes

Last week, Uber board member Arianna Huffington held an all-hands meeting with employees to outline the steps that will be taken to change the culture to one of inclusiveness and collaboration. While the sexist comment made to her by another board member, David Bonderman, received attention, something else stood out

The Respect in Responsiveness

Many issues arise each day to challenge our problem-solving and coping skills at work. If I were asked to force rank which of the problems, when left unresolved, have the most substantial long-term negative impact on a company, it would be reduced responsiveness. Other candidates like missed deadlines, stressful interpersonal

Leading from Crisis or Reserve

Photo credit: David Porter     During a trip to Santa Fe, New Mexico, the raw beauty of the place struck me, but the most profound impression was the amount of reserve built into the area. The reserve stood out in the roadways, the Albuquerque airport, and everywhere we traveled in the

Focus on Getting Better, Not Looking Good

In my whole life, I have known no wise people (over a broad subject matter area) who didn’t read all the time — none, zero. Charlie Munger of Berkshire Hathaway I read this quote recently, and my thoughts turned, as they often do, to the implications lifelong learning has on

A Permission Slip

A former colleague just started a new job. I remember him for many things, but I thought about him today because he is one of those all too rare people that speaks his mind about things large and small in the world. That makes him an intriguing person because he

Invigorating Customer Service

Last week, I spent nearly an hour at a title company related to a real estate transaction. The lobby was nice enough — Keurig machine, water, and snacks for the waiting clients. Just after I arrived for an 11:00 closing, a realtor, and her well-dressed client walked in. At about

Cuting Through the Noise — Move to Doing

Hearing, listening, knowing, and doing walk into a bar. Or at least doing steps in as he is the only one that is, well, doing. A shared leadership problem is that we confuse listening with hearing, and knowing with doing in our communication. This confusion creates barriers to getting results,

Overcoming the Illusion of Communication

Most of us have experienced effective and ineffective communication in our businesses. We marvel, often in frustration, at the efficiency of the grapevine (perhaps now morphed into the Slack-vine). We wish to control our messages, but the informal network adds its meaning and velocity. We send out a message to

Celebrating the Challenging Boss

Over the course of a career, we work with dozens of bosses. We often look at bosses with a sense of wonderment because they have some magical powers bestowed upon them by their titles and we believe they hold our future in their hands. It follows that our experiences with

Everything's Made Up!

One of many profound lessons I’ve learned during my career is that everything’s made up. This is a powerful and liberating message for employees and leaders trying to improve an organization. Why? Because if something’s made up, then we are free to invent its replacement. Whenever I

Focused Customer Service

It was a particularly busy Saturday night at the Bubble Room Restaurant, located on southwest Florida barrier island, Captiva. The usual one-hour line of guests crammed the bar, and every table filled with diners. I was serving a five-table downstairs section and another server, Scott, was in the section next

Taming the Tough Conversation

A CEO I worked for asked me one day, “Is there anything you are afraid of?” My quick reply, “Not at work.” As I remember it, he just shook his head. Upon reflection, my response was an unintended exaggeration. The reality is that I’ve had my share of fears

Heroes Ask for Help

Credit: Shutterstock   One day a problem came to my attention, and I wanted to lend a hand. I spoke with the management employee about how I could help, and we moved forward together to solve the resource problem. He was a long-term company employee and thanked me for my assistance.

Planting Seeds for Collaboration

A baby boomer business owner grew up in work environments that tacitly encouraged individuals to hold onto their knowledge for their reasons, the main one being job security. As this custom home builder grew his business, he wanted to try a different approach. While his learned behavior told him to

Sustained Excellence

I’m a passionate and unapologetic student of leadership and high-performance people and organizations. Living in the backyard of the most celebrated professional sports franchise of the last two decades, the San Antonio Spurs of the NBA has provided me with years of entertainment and profound learning. Gregg Popovich, the

Setting Higher Standards

In business and life, we all get to choose when we raise or lower standards, when we subsidize mediocrity and when we settle for something less than we desire. Standards provide a benchmark for us to aspire to achieve in sports, school, work, and life. There is often a friend,

Simplifying our Stories

As leaders, we spend a lot of time in our heads speculating about next steps, teasing out possibilities, and getting stuck. Often, we take simple problems, add an unhealthy dose of “what if” to the mix, and create a horrifying view of a future decision or discussion that scares us

Undiscussable: Pressing Pause and Play

Have you ever been in a meeting where the topic was controversial, and everyone tiptoed around communicating the undiscussable elephant in the room? Did you think about saying something but held back? Did you speak in an indirect way hoping somebody would connect with what you wanted to say? Did

Fire Walking

One of the speakers at a recent conference is an icon in the consulting industry. As part of his remarks, he playfully mocked the notion of firewalking as a component of personal development. While highlighting the story of an event at which several participants suffered burns on their feet, he

Values in Use

Most large organizations have a list of values that the leadership team developed in an offsite. These espoused values, the aspirational ones placed on conference room walls, show up in the monthly company newsletter and are designed to guide decision-making for an organization, but often fall short of doing anything

Greener Pastures

The story goes that one early summer day in Iowa, a minister traveling down a country road came upon an expansive farm that took his breath away. As he slowed his car, he noticed the farmer on his John Deere combine working in the field. He stopped his car, walked

Creative Workspaces Still Need Leaders

The cubicle farm of the late 20th century has been replaced in over 60% of businesses by the open architecture, creative workspace. The idea is that this will lead to increased communication and collaboration of team members, which will drive higher productivity, better customer service and improved financial results. With

The Art of Letting Go

One of the most challenging things for leaders of all levels, supervisor to CEO, is the difficulty of letting go of control. Especially for something we do well. Holding on to control gives us several things. It provides us with the certainty of a job done right, or at least

Solving Problems

One of the primary tasks of any leader is to solve problems. No matter what your current experience is with handling issues, it is inevitable you will see something new that tests your capabilities in this area. Many problem-solving tools exist, so go with the one that works for you.